Love in the time of a brand new album

GOSSIP. Happy tidings this past weekend as two stars of equal celebrity, Skechers spokeswoman Ashlee Simpson and diminutive East Village bar owner Pete Wentz, tied the knot at her parents’ home in Encino, Calif.

Father/manager Joe Simpson not only hosted the event, but also officiated the ceremony because, let’s not forget, before going pro with progeny pimping, he was an ordained minister. Maid of honor and not-at-all-bitter older sister Jessica Simpson brought Tony Romo as her date to make sure the press paid at least some attention to her on the big day. You’re welcome, Jess.

Unfortunately, when it came time to read her vows, a different prerecorded track played and Ashlee ended up reading the bat mitzvah portion of the Torah. Boy, was her face red.

Fun with hyphenation
In other celebrity nuptial news, Ellen DeGeneres announced on her talk show Friday that she plans to marry longtime companion Portia de Rossi now that gay marriage has been legalized in the Golden State. That means one of them is going to have the most amazing hyphenated last name ever.

Dancing baby redux
Us Weekly caught sight of 2-year-old Suri Cruise donning a pair of toddler-size tap shoes. Apparently, the littlest thetan-blocker is taking dance classes along with mom Katie Holmes. And really, it’s about time that freeloader started doing something to bring in some scratch for the family. Doesn’t she know we’re in a recession? Vitamin B12 supplements don’t pay for themselves.